How body language increases your charisma.

Let’s be honest, in business charisma counts. A lot. And Charisma is about impressive communication and body language as well as topics and content. I’ve seen how many qualified people were passed over for promotion (or lost a job or let an interview fail) just because they couldn’t show convincing and charismatic communication.

Max Weber, the father of sociology, coined the term “charisma” to describe inspiring leaders. Originally from the Greek “kharisma”, which means favor or divine gift, charisma was also defined as “partly trust mediating, partly presence and partly sex appeal”. But however we define it, we recognize charisma when we see it. We call someone charismatic when he or she somehow makes us accept his/her vision – whether it’s in a business, social or political environment.

 

What charisma means from the point of view of non-verbal communication

As a body language coach, I define charisma as, among other things, a complete correspondence between what you say and how you look and sound when you say it.

Body language communicates your emotions and motivations, interests, likes or dislikes.
Whether you are applying for a job, presenting your idea to a venture capitalist or presenting a new business strategy to the board, you will be most charismatic and convincing if what you feel inside is perfectly aligned with what you verbally express. (At this point your body language automatically becomes congruent with your words.) That is why my coaching sessions always start with questions about your emotional intention: What is the core of the message you want to convey? How do you really feel about it? How important is that to you? Why should others care about your opinion?

Charismatic leaders, speakers and influencers use a wide range of non-verbals”sympathy cues”. They show a real smile, maintain a positive eye contact, use a variety of gestures, orient their bodies towards those they deal with, touch others during conversations, etc. And everyone can be coached to include more of these positive signals (and to reduce unwanted, negative signals) in their interactions.

 

Don’t stand in your own way

But here’s something else I discovered about Charisma.
Sometimes you just shouldn’t stand in your own way to be really impressive in the eyes of others.
I once worked with the head of a marketing department who was preparing for a big company presentation. This man was charming, smart and had a great sense of humour. In an informal setting, his body language was congruent and expressive. But he was also a rather introverted person. Put him on stage in front of an audience and he became a non-verbal catastrophe.

You may find yourself in a similar situation. When you talk to friends, you use your hands and face to describe an event or object. You smile, frown, shrug your shoulders and make broad illustrative gestures. But at important business presentations you become anxious or self-confident. And as a result, your most eloquent body language suffers.

If so, you may not need to work on non-verbal techniques. Rather, like my client, you may be better off learning to relax and focus more on your audience than on yourself – to let your natural, sparkling personality and body language “speak”.

Above all, we tend to follow charismatic leaders because they are perceived as self-confident and optimistic. And here you can see the power of the body-spirit connection in action.

 

Your own body language influences your condition

You already know that the way you feel affects your body language. (If you are depressed, you tend to hang your shoulders and look down. If you are optimistic, you tend to smile and stand upright and proud). But did you know that the opposite is also the case? The way you stand, your gestures, your movements and even your facial expressions influence your emotions by sending messages back to your brain.

In several experiments, individuals were asked to smile and then shown pictures of various events. The smiling participants reported that they liked the pictures and were even thrilled. When subjects were supposed to frown during the same type of experiment, they reported feelings of anger and rage. Further studies have shown that a smile is not only a result of happiness or satisfaction, but can also cause physiological changes in body temperature, heart rate and skin resistance. So smiling can make you happier!

 

Charisma Tips

So the next time you want to be seen as your most charismatic self, try these simple but effective tips:

• Start to align your verbal and non-verbal communication by focusing on the emotional intent of your message.
• Then stand up straight, pull your shoulders back and hold your head up. Just by adopting this physical position, you will feel more secure.
• And if you add a smile, you will influence your brain and attitude even more positively.
• Keep sending non-verbal sympathy cues throughout the interaction.

 

Of course there are many other suggestions to make in order to create even more charisma…

 

About the author of this article:
Etienne Dubach stays a lot in Barcelona but works internationally.
He is a versatile and passionate coach, personality developer and author.
With over 1000 training days and 12 years of communication studies, he brings a wealth of experience and broad repertoire into all of his seminars.
Find out more about Etienne HERE.